Signs Of Insanity
by Tash2c
Summary: There are certain signs one can look for when wandering if they are insane... Lily Evans slowly considers her perfectly sane self insane after some changes of events in her life concerning Mr Potter..LJ R


_Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the characters. _

Just a note: This story may be slow with updates, very busy with school work lately so dont get much time to work on it. Also a thanks to Jestin! as she inspired me and betad for me with this story.

**_Signs of Insanity_**

There are certain signs one can check for when wandering if they are insane. And I've personally considered myself perfectly sane up until recently. I've pondered about these signs and have decided that these are the following things that could make me, Lily Evans officially insane;

1.Talking to yourself (sometimes out loud)

2.Fighting with yourself (but not physical)

3.Losing total body and speech control at certain moments

4.Having meaningful conversations with the toaster.

5.Trying to make a list of the Warning Signs of Insanity.

6.Walking into objects that aren't really there.

7.Talking about the large frogs leaping through your stomach.

8.Getting distracted by the simplest things.

9.Getting words mixed up e.g. Instead of "sorry" you say "thank you".

10.Having thoughts about James Potter.

Really, the last point would sum all of my insanity up for me. The day that I say 'I love you' to James Potter would be the day that the men in white jackets come for me. It of course doesn't help that I have reoccurring dreams about little green zombie house elves chasing me, and then getting saved by this huge stag. But let's not get into that. Let's stay on the conscious side of my mind and not the evil one that comes out when I sleep. You would think that with the way I'm speaking, that I am fighting my inner demons but I like to call them inner pricks. Anyway I'm rambling, how? do you ask that a smart and respectable student and mind you prefect, gets into this mode of thought? Well it all started with one predicament about two months ago…

"James Potter!" Professor McGonagall shouted at a scruffy, raven haired boy in the back row of the class room. "Would you be so kind as to pay attention to what I am explaining rather than trying to singe the ends of Alice's hair?"

The boy ran his hand through his hair messing it up even more, and put down his wand. He sat up properly in his chair resuming attention towards the professor. Several girls giggled, and he ruffled his hair up more.

"As I was saying" Professor McGonagall continued "There is going to be an assignment for you all, which will be due first thing next year. This assignment is going to be done in _assigned_ pairs." Everyone in the class room groaned… _assigned pairs? _

"Yes assigned pairs. For the assignment you must all come up with your own transfiguring spell and you must keep a log book on how you went about to creating this transfiguration spell as well as how it turned out etcetera." She explained.

"Now, the pairings… lets start with Sirius Black who will be paired with Remus Lupin…" Sirius gave his best friend, James a shrug. Professor McGonagall continued "Peter Pettigrew and Frank Longbottom, Marlene McKinnon and Alice you two can be pairs…" When I realized that my two best friends were paired together I began to wander, who am I going to be paired with? Professor McGonagall went through several more pairs and finally I heard her say my name. Dreading who I was going to be paired with I held my breath.

"Lily Evans you will be paired with lets see here, James Potter!" I nearly gagged as she said that. I saw James' face light up with glee as Sirius winked at him. James had been asking me out ever since, well for years now! And each time I declined, but he would never give up. Though lately I had noticed that he wasn't showing off to me much and he hadn't asked me the evil question as often.

Professor McGonagall continued the pairings and then dismissed the class. I was speechless and didn't know what to do. I was paired with Potter for a bloody summer assignment! As Marlene, Alice and I walked quickly down the corridors to get to lunch at the great hall, James and co had somehow gotten in front of us. I sighed as James addressed me.

"Evans, me and you are paired for this assignment!" James stated

"Stating the obvious now are you Potter?" I monotonously replied and at the sight of his face I added "Can we figure out what we're doing for it another day? I'm hungry right now and have plans tonight."

"That's fine by me Evans, whenever you have time is okay I mean we do have ALL summer…Well I'm off, see you at our study date Evans!" James casually slipped in.

"Yes see you at our study da… Hey it's not going to be a date okay!" Lily shouted at the back of James' head. He just waved and continued walking down the corridors with his fellow marauders.

"He annoys me SO MUCH!" Lily fumed when her and her friends had gone out onto the grounds near the lake to eat. It was a nice clear day and really hot, just like how Lily was feeling.

"Don't worry Lily, it won't be that bad." Alice said trying to get Lily to relax.

"Alice is right Lils just don't stress about it and it's only an assignment not like you two will have to talk much, just ignore him unless what he has to say is about the work..." Marlene added

"I guess you two are right…"

Later that night Lily found herself curled up in the big armchair in front of the common room fire. Whilst she sat there gazing into the fire, Marlene and Alice played a game of exploding snap. It was quite late actually and there was hardly anyone in the room. Slowly the flames of the fire began to die, and even though her friends had gone up to go to sleep in their dorms earlier, Lily still sat in the chair.

She started thinking about how she would be going home soon, going home to her sister's engagement party. Something she definitely was not looking forward to.

And then she thought about her assignment. Why did it have to be Potter? How was she going to be able to do the assignment anyway? Because of her sisters engagement party she swore to her parents she would use no form of magic for the whole time Vernon, Petunias fiancé was there. This happened to be all holidays bar one week, the last one.

"What are you going to do Lily? I guess I'm just going to have to discuss it with Potter. I'll ask if there's a train station or a bus depot near where he lives and I'll just have to go to his house…" Lily mumbled to herself falling asleep on the chair.

Lily was running, running fast. But from what?

She ran all the way down many corridors and stopped at a large portrait of fruit. She raised her hand up to the pear and tickled it. As soon as it stopped giggling the portrait swung open to reveal a large kitchen.

It was quiet, too quiet. Everything started molding and changing shape and now instead of a nice warm orange fire gleaming at her it turned green. So many things started turning green. The pots, the pans, the tables! Lily heard a snicker from the corner of the once warm welcoming kitchen. An overgrown green house elf started walking towards her still snickering. Suddenly there were five more of them all heading towards her, snickering loudly some even started turning into serpent's, big silvery grey snakes.

She turned to the portrait hole but it was closed she didn't know what to do, she was scared. Then the first green house elf started speaking.

"She must be punished everyone, How dare she a Mudblood mess with us and try to show us up."

The elf raised a wand and began reciting a spell "Cru-"

Suddenly a huge stag came rampaging through the once closed portrait hole, it lowered its antlers and began knocking out all the zombie house elves as if it was a game of ten pin bowling. As soon as the stag had knocked out all the elves everything started changing back to normal, and the kitchen became warm and welcoming once more. Lily turned to bid thanks to the stag, but alas it was gone…

"Evans, Evans wake up. You must have been having a nightmare. Lily!" James gave Lily a little shake when he said her name and then she began to wake.

"Where'd you go? I wanted to say thanks" Lily mumbled sleepily

"Ah, Lily who are you talking to? There's only me here…" James calmly asked her

"James? Oh I must have fallen asleep I'm sorry I was having a night- Hey! You called me Lily…"

"And you just called me James. Well sorry about that Evans it just slipped. You should get up to bed its quite late, about 2am."

"Yes… okay James, good night then. We will have to talk later about that assignment, I'm afraid I have to tell you something."

"Yes sure. Goodnight. Sweet dreams… Lily." James muttered as she climbed the stairs.

The next day continued on normally well at least to many it was normal. The marauders and Lily's friends couldn't help but notice some kind of connection between Lily and James. During their DADA lesson Lily gave James approximately two glances, and James subconsciously did his hair ruffling as well as smile at Lily a few times. At the end of the lesson James and Lily were among the first to leave, and as Marlene and the Marauders left the class room to join their peculiar friends that day they saw them saying good bye, as if they had had a normal no arguing conversation.

After having two sandwiches with Marlene and Alice at lunch, Lily bid them farewell explaining that she needed to go to the library to study. This didn't seem strange to Marlene and Alice, but to the marauders it was. James had just explained the same thing to them at lunch but seeming as Sirius had the map at the time, the marauders investigated further. They saw James and Lily meet up in front of the library and go in together.

"So, Lily you wanted to tell me something?" James asked her being cautious of the words he used.

"Umm, yes. It's about our assignment. Well you see, it's just that, uh well it's hard to explain." Lily told him uncertainly

"I see, well if it's that you don't want me to be your partner…"

"No! It's not that," Lily said so quickly she surprised herself, James' face lit up.

"Well if it's not that, what's wrong?" he questioned seeming quite happy with himself.

"Well you know how I have muggle parents and a sister…"

"You have a Sister?"

"Yeah, and a rotten one at that! But that's the problem. My sister, she's having her engagement celebration this summer, and she convinced my parents to not allow me to do any sort of magic while her pig of a fiancé is there." Lily sort of blurted out with disgust.

"I think I begin to see the problem… So you can't do the assignment with me for like what a week in the holiday? No problem really…"

"No, there's more to it than that. He's staying for the whole holiday bar the last week." She groaned

"Okay, that is a problem. But don't your parents know that all the work you get for this holiday is more important than anything else? Next year is your last year you know."

"Yes of course I know that Potter! Do you think I'm dumb! I can do my other homework discreetly but this is a practical assignment and not to mention in pairs" Lily exclaimed through gritted teeth.

"Well, would your mum let you go out to my place maybe to do the assignment?" James asked her trying to keep the conversation from turning to argument.

"She would once I tell her how important it is, but that's what I wanted to ask you is there a bus depot or perhaps a train station where you live?"

At that moment James began to laugh. "You think you can catch a muggle bus to my home?"

"Yes, why not?" Lily asked feeling stupid.

"Evans your better off catching the Knight Bus. It's much faster." James smiled

He spent the rest of lunch with Lily explaining to her how to catch the knight bus as well as instructions to get to his house. It was not only the Marauders now who noticed their long absence, Alice and Marlene noticed that James too was gone. And when they questioned the Marauders about James' whereabouts, a sly Sirius told them the whole situation, covering up the existence of the map by saying they followed.

_Well thats chapter One... Please tell me what you think! also through out the story Lily will experience all the different signs of insanity. insane is fun and crazy. anyway Review! _

Tash2c


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